A product review... sort of?

Okay, let me say I'm not getting paid for this review, and Yoplait had better be GLAD they didn't pay me because this isn't gonna be good for them...

So recently I went to the grocery store and thought I would try some random brand of Greek yogurt that EVERY yogurt maker has now. It's gotten so bad that two new brands have popped up. Oinkos and something else... chabata or chiamini or something, I can't remember.

Anyway, I thought I would try the Yoplait because it was cheaper than the others and I do like the taste of Yoplait, in general.
The store only had blueberry and honey vanilla. Well... I like blueberry yogurt. Yum! And I figured... Honey is a good flavor, so is vanilla. You can't go wrong with vanilla, right?

WRONG!! OH SO WRONG!!!

I tried the honey vanilla first. It was disgusting! It was like eating a dirty gym sock soaked in buttermilk and dipped in rotten egg.

This stuff was so vile I almost puked. I had the nasty aftertaste in my mouth even after I had brushed my teeth and tongue. Vile!

I would rather have eaten liver.

I hate liver.

And lima beans.

I like liver better than lima beans.

I like them both better than this honey vanilla greek puke.

So tonight... er this morning I thought I would go for the blueberry. I thought maybe the gross out taste of the honey vanilla was because I'd never had honey flavored yogurt before.

Oh how wrong I was!!!

There was an okay blueberry taste to this. However... the gross Greekiness of the previous flavor was still there! So I can't blame the honey flavor. It's completely the yogurt.

I only had three bites of this before I couldn't swallow anymore. It was just too vile. I still have the aftertaste in my mouth. I'm still scarred!!

Now, let me also say this...

I do like yogurt.

In fact, I love yogurt. Fruit on the bottom. Fruit not on the bottom. Put some nuts in it. Or cereal. Or eat it plain.

When I was a kid, the cherry was always my favorite. Kids don't generally eat yogurt! But I did! This was before that gogurt squeezy stuff and the Trix put spinkles on it, this was 70's plain, eat it because I said so and I'm your mother! Yogurt. So I am not biased against all yogurt. Just this... ancient Greek fermented semen and buttermilk combo.

Yoplait... I still love you... Just not your Greek. Please fire him, immediately!!

K. Thanks. Bai!!


Jen <3

Well then...

So Mom has made the final payment on the car. It is hers, finally.

I've pointed my finger up at the sky and glared at God...
I've pointed my finger down at Satan...
I've pointed my finger at Jinx and Loki...
All those mischief makers are on notice. I've told them ALL I know their tricks.


(I'm not implying God is a mischief maker... however he does allow a lot of crap to happen to mom and me. And frankly, I'm tired of it.)(We've prayed long and hard about stuff, and so far so good.) (I had to add that in case God thinks I'm an ungrateful brat.) (Not that God is reading my blog.)

We need to sell the house! We need to clean the place up! We need to do the bankruptcy thing because dad credit carded us into way too much debt. Anybody wanna buy a dvd??

I'm in under the gun, so it's okay. Late for cake, but okay.
Today is Robert Knepper's bday! So I made a cake... My mother eated it, apparently...
Cake. It's a Funfetti cake. It was a half batch in a tiny box for a dollar at Kmart! Dollar cake, sorry Mr. Knepper... It really wasn't intended to be a birthday cake, but it was there... 

Here's the frosting. Looks like crap, but tastes good. The dark part underneath is the mixed butter, sugar and vanilla. The white stuff on top is more confectioner's sugar. I had to darken the photo a little so you could see what's in the bowl.

Okay, here it is. I didn't want to take it out of the pan. We don't have any square plates, so this is a white trash birthday, I reckon. Also... no candles.

Here is the birthday boy in 'gonk' form. If you don't know what a gonk is, I suggest you visit wikipedia and give it a look. No, a gonk is not a Star Wars robot, not in this case. These gonks are much cuter... ;) Oh, see who is peeking over Robert's shoulder? Even my mom got that one. She laughed.

Ah, here's the birthday boy with his cake. I think he was going for the frosting!

Here he is with the first bite of cake. He looks a little stunned. Perhaps because it's so good? 

And here is the cake thief, thieving the cake.

I also made brownies and mom was moaning by the time she'd had two bites of cake.

Also... Robert was dressed as T-Bag for the evening's festivities. You can't see his blue pants. Also... barefooted. :p

Someday I will have a full body shot of wee Robert so you can see his whole cuteness. (I do realize it doesn't look a whole lot like the real person. It's a doll for cryin' out loud. Gonks aren't supposed to be the most detailed, that's why they're so charming. :p)

Well...

Well, I got nothing. I guess a rousing round of 'Happy 4th of July' or 'Happy Independence day America'. But I'm just not into it. We didn't do anything this year. Usually we get out the little grill and Dad does the charcoal. But this year Dad just wasn't around to do that for us. First holiday without him. It's just waaaay too fresh.

Mango, mango, mango.... squirrel, mango, mango... 'possum, mango, mango... anole

Mangoes, pretty, aren't they?
Well, yes, they are, actually. They taste good too.
Pictures can be deceiving however. No one tells you that when you cut into one, the juices will dribble all over your hands, arms, clothes. You'll reek of mango juice for days, even after a thorough shower. You'll have mango sap under your finger nails and between your fingers. Mango strings between your teeth that no amount of flossing will get out.

And the smell. OH MY GOD, the smell! Not just the ripe smell, but the rotting smell. If you toss the rotting ones away, you have to do this very far from your house. No use throwing them into your neighbor's yard, you'll still smell them. For two months we have this-- this torture! It's almost over.

We also have people coming in and asking for them. Ripe, green, they don't care. It never fails, every mango season they come and we turn them away at first. But now... now I feel like standing on the sidewalk in front of the house and lobbing them into the open windows of cars passing by. That's how much I want to be rid of these. It's like a friggen Easter Egg hunt every day! Oh, and half of them aren't even edible because the squirrels, opossums, and that damn Cuban Anole (asshole) that lives in the tree.

Well, anywhoooo... One of these days I'll actually have pictures of my own to share. I have a project just finished that's good for a chuckle, or guffaw. Whatever.

Twitter

What is it?
No, seriously. I've tried it before. About two years ago. Didn't like it. I mean... what do I have to tweet about?

dad driving me nuts again
Ate lunch.
got the poops
back to the bathroom, oops. (that wasn't supposed to rhyme!!)
Playing mahjong
playing solitaire
I'm bored, back to mahjong
Dinnertime!!
Nap! nap nap nap!! ;)
Nothing on tv!! I'm bored! mahjong!
Sudoku anyone??
I want to craft! No craft! No sun! Booo hisssss
Geee, Robert Knepper is teh sexay!
I need to sew!! Too lazy to pull out sewing machine. Maybe tomorrow....

Yeah... that'll interest EVERYONE!! Psssshhhhhh!!!

Bad Blogger

So I've been remiss in posting. I'm afraid I do that a whole lot. I guess I don't think things are important enough for everyone to read. But yet I've read some pretty silly blogs about nothing.

So hey, I'll post some pretty pictures here. I want this:

That's a Friesian. They come from the Netherlands. Soooo pretty!!!
I also want one of these:

It's a Gypsy Vanner Horse, or Gypsy Cob. Created to pull gypsy caravans in England. I don't think American type Gypsies or Travelers use them, nor do Carny Barkers.

Oddly enough, when I was a little girl I had no desires to own a horse or pony. My cousins said they were getting one for their birthday (it didn't happen) and I was like... "Why?" But now I want a horse, some sheep and goats, maybe a cow and bull, some ducks and swans and... oh... I'd like a farm and some people to tend it because I don't like manual labor too much. I guess if there were things to do, I'd do them, but I wouldn't be thrilled about it. :p

Also... I want this:

I love the way he leans. <3 <3 Now THAT'S a carnival barker, right there! I wonder if he owns a Gypsy Vanner....